Facebook De-tox

Once or twice a year we do a detox or cleanse. It's usually in the spring, and it feels great to flush out the body and get all systems functioning normally (if you get my meaning).

Well, my "anti-resolutions" led to some detoxing of another kind. For whatever reason, and it really was random, I woke up on a Friday a couple weeks ago determined NOT to get on Facebook. I had no idea when or if I would get back on again. It was enlightening and astonishing to realize how much my world had come to revolve around Facebook. My thoughts are in "post" form almost constantly. I feel deprived and go through withdrawal-like symptoms. I was disgusted with myself. For 100 hours I avoided Facebook. It wasn't easy at times, and others it was a relief. When I did get back on I had no desire to post, comment, or "like" anything. I really only got on b/c I was curious if I had any messages (I had 3). I then changed my settings to e-mail me if messages came through, thinking that I'd go back to neglecting FB on a regular basis. But I didn't. Like an addiction to a drug I've "had" to check FB throughout the day. I kept saying to myself--"Well, there's nothing to do right now," or "I might as well, while I wait on X." Pathetic.

It was nearly two weeks before any of my supposed 500+ "friends" noticed. I was delighted that even one person noticed I went from several daily posts to nothing for two weeks. I guess that's something, right?

So, now what do I do? I fully rejected social media when it first started. I fought FB until my sister basically said that's they only way to connect with her (irony: she is no longer on FB). I fully embraced FB a few years ago, and in fact became a huge promoter and maven. I said it was the modern mommy water cooler--the best way to connect with moms across the world, especially when it can feel isolating being at home with kids all day. It's a fantastic tool for small businesses...or is it? I manage 5 FB pages. Stepping back now, what is FB really doing for me? Why am I on FB?

I know that being off FB has led to more time with my kids, more time connecting with my husband and friends, and more peace. Mental peace. I also sleep better. I'm still thinking in "post" form, and I'd love for that to stop. I miss not sharing every hilarious thing my kids say or do, the food I make, and liking and commenting on friends' posts, but why? I think, if I'm honest, I like the attention. So, basically then, I use FB to brag about all the awesome things I do--even when they are the awesome-awful things. You know, the ridiculous "fails" we post. Oy. I think I sound a bit narcissistic. I "like" and comment sometimes b/c it feels like the accepted and expected thing to do. Oh, you're pregnant--I'll like that! Oh, you made granola? Yum, like that. Have an opinion on guns? Me too! It's your birthday? Thanks to FB, I actual know & now must spam your wall. (Let's be honest, would you wish a happy birthday to half the friends you have on FB if it weren't for FB reminding you? I'm lucky to remember my own birthday.)

Recently, a friend of mine shut down her FB account--insisted upon by her then fiance (now husband). He didn't like how stressed FB made her. She would read other mom's posts and feel like she was a failure. She'd read people's rants, and get stressed--feeling a need to voice her opinion too. At the time, I thought it was extreme to drop it all together, and that maybe she was just taking things a bit too serious. Now, I'm rethinking that it wasn't such a bad idea. There are definitely better ways to spend our time.

Another issue is that I really don't like FB now. It's not what it was a few years back--definitely functions with a focus on profit. Sad.

I don't have a conclusion. I'm not ready to fully close my FB account. Right now, I'm continuing to wean myself down. I'll start with FB-free weekends and FB-free homeschooling. (Is it ironic, sad, or pathetic that I will post this blog on FB?)

For those friends & family members on FB who've missed the latest "happenings" in our world, here's a FB-style run-down:

• Matt accepted a new job at Frontier Charter Academy doing IT. He still teaches music lessons, and has a full load of students too.
• We are finally all healthy after a nasty flu bug. Eden started & ended it. Her detoxifying came with a couple days of hives. (I was hoping it was a kick-off to chicken pox, but no such luck.)
• I am no longer working outside of the home--full-on SAHM (with a doula/lactation client here & there, and a PR client occasionally). A dream in the making for nearly 8 years. 
• Owen had his first swim meet. He did great. Well, he at least did not come in dead last. :)
• Homeschooling is awesome. That is all.
• I actually did make homemade granola. Pumpkin Spice and Blueberry-Pecan Gingerbread. They really are awesome. Not sure it's saving us much money. I think we're just eating a lot more granola now.